Gen Con Milwaukee Remembered: Part 6

Here is the last of the Gen Con series of journal entries that I wrote back early last decade when Gen Con was held in Milwaukee. This particular entry chronicles the last days of Milwaukee's Gen Con.

So dig in and enjoy.....

Saturday August 11^th, 2002.

- Another healthy walk to the Midwest Express Convention Center brings me to Sci-Fi Saturday. It is the day in which most of the celebrity Q&A sessions are to take place.

- I get there at about 9:30am and see that certain Gen Con traditions will never die. The entire schedule has indeed changed. I get on the pay phone and leave a message on Spanky’s cell phone (THAT HE SHOULD HAVE HAD TURNED ON!!!) and tell him to get here STAT ‘cause Lisa Ryder’s (Becka from “Andromeda”) Q&A was a few minutes away.

- I’m not much of an “Andromeda” fan at all. I think I watched half of one episode once. But I’ll tell you this, if you thought Lisa Ryder was pretty on television…. you need to see her in person! I made sure I got a good seat near the front.

PEOPLE WATCHING LESSON #4:

WHEN OGLING THE FEMALE CELEBRITIES… revert back to Lesson #3!

- Miss Ryder seemed very personable and happy to see everyone. Half the people there were from her fan club which seemed to consist of young, giggling girls. Go figure.

- I walk across the way where officials were getting ready for the costume contest.

- I took a picture of a gentleman in an incredible Legolas (From Lord of the Rings) outfit.

- There was still no sign of Spanky or Koreboy by the time Ethan Phillips (Star Trek: Voyager / Benson) showed up for his Q&A.

- Surprisingly he didn’t talk a lot about Voyager. Instead he talked about what it was like starting out as a stage actor in New York. It was quite interesting and entertaining until…

- Suddenly the door to the room swings open. A figure wearing a tie-dye Darth Maul T-Shirt stands in the doorway… It’s Spanky.

- Spanky makes his way over to where I’m sitting right in the middle of Mr. Phillips Q&A. Spanky is accompanied by Koreboy and his friend Tom.

- Mr. Phillips makes the wise decision to ignore the interruption and go on with his story.

- The Q&A session ends and Spanky shows me his bag of free con swag. He’s in geek heaven.

- About 15 minutes later the next Q&A session starts. It’s Warwick Davis who played the title role in the fantasy film “Willow” as well as Wickett the Ewok in “Star Wars, Episode VI: Return of the Jedi”.

- Warwick was very funny and seemed to have a great sense of humor about things. He was very outgoing and charming.

- After he waddled on off Spanky, Koreboy, Tom and I decide to head to the mall and get a bite to eat.

- Outside of one unfortunate incident involving Tom, his wedge fries and the floor, lunch at the mall was pretty uneventful.

- We decide to head back to the main hall where Spanky wanted to get some celebrity autographs and play some form of “Family Feud” that would win him MORE free swag.

- We head to the autograph area where Ethan Phillips is signing. Spanky is in front of me in line and reaches Ethan first.

- At this time Spanky decides it’s time to play Mr. Comedy with Ethan and asks poor, tired Ethan to sign his autograph “ To the president of the James Noble Fan Club. (James Noble is the actor who portrayed the Governor on the TV sitcom “Benson” on which Ethan Phillips played Pete Downey) Ya see, in Spanky’s mind an obscure character actor reference = big side splitting laugh from Star Trek celebrity. Mr. Phillips gives a quick chuckle. No side splitting laugh as was expected by Spanky.

- When I get to Ethan, he asks me if I’m a member of the same fan club.

- I reply, “…umm, I think I let my membership laps.” At which he gives a bit more of a laugh than he did with Spanky.

- We move off the autograph stage and over to the hallway to get our swag in order when “it” hits my nostrils…

- Either rotting corpses have risen from the grave and are lurking up and down the halls of Gen Con, or somebody decided that three days of non stop gaming with no bathing would be a welcoming idea. Think again, B.O. Boy!

- I decide that it would have been a good idea for convention officials to hand out bars of soap to people entering the con.

- We decide to split up because Spanky, Tom and Koreboy want to go “play the Feud” while I stay in people watching mode.

- I walk up and down the isles a bit more and run into the Clyde Caldwell art booth.

- I have a very good time looking at his wonderful fantasy art.

- I have an even better time looking at his wonderful model dressed in skimpy barbarian clothing…. Not that I’m into that or anything. Hey, I’m an art lover. What can I say?

- I run into Hope, Mario and a few other people I have gamed with including Dave and Jim. We walk around a bit together and end up by the autograph stage to just shoot the breeze a bit.

- While I’m in mid conversation I hear what sounds like Daffy Duck having his liver pulled out of him through his nostril with no anesthesia. The sound seems to be coming from the autograph stage.

- I suddenly realize that it’s Spanky calling my name.

- I look up to the stage, and sure enough, there’s Spanky holding up the line of people who want to get Don P. Davis’ autograph.

- He sees I have my camera and wants a picture of him and Don together.

- He continues to hold up the line until I get the picture taken.

- Just as I’m about to go back to Hope and Mario, Spanky grabs me as he comes off the stage and pulls me over to a smaller autograph table where Lisa Ryder is signing.

- He has her sign a picture and write, “Spanky, SHUT UP!” on it. Ya see, this way when people who know Spanky see the autograph, they’ll figure Miss Ryder is a close friend of his too seeing as most of his friends spend a lot of time telling him to “SHUT UP!” Not gunna happen, Spanky.

- I take his picture with her. She looks freighted.

- I finally get back to Hope, Mario and the others and finish our conversation.

- We no sooner head out into the lobby when Bruce and Leslie show up dressed in full Rebel Trooper outfits (You know, the guys who wore those goofy white helmets, who ended up being cannon fodder at the beginning of “Star Wars, Episode IV: A New Hope”). Not far behind them is a fellow dressed up as infamous Imperial leader, Grand Admiral Thrawn (From the SW novels Aire to the Empire, The Last Command…etc.), blue face and all!! Very cool!

- I take many pictures of them all!

- Not much happening after they close the main hall doors, so I head home.

Sunday, August 11^th, 2002.

- I arrive at Gen Con at 9:30am to meet Koreboy in the main lobby of the Midwest Express Center so he can drop off something he picked up for me at this year’s Wizard World Convention (a big comic book convention in Chicago).

- I’m in a rather melancholy mood with this being the last day of the last Milwaukee Gen Con. But, what can ya do. Incompetence and greed always seem to come out on top, don’t they?

- After a while Koreboy shows up with Tom and Spanky in tow. He hands me a bag with a small treasure inside. A 6” Chianna from “Farscape” action figure. Now I have my little own GiGi Edgley to put up in my work space at my job. Do you see how sad, little pathetic things can make me happy.

- They head into the main hall while I wait for two of my fellow Cthulhu players who have never been to Gen Con to show up.

- After a while Muffy and Shifty show up and we head into the convention.

- After fiddling around with getting Shifty and Muffy registered and trying to put together the annoying, little, cheap plastic chain that holds the con badge around one’s neck, we head up to the show room.

- Within the first 10 minutes, Muffy and Shifty have dropped $30. It’s going to be an expensive day. Especially because I have to get my hands on whatever’s left here that I want!!

- During the day, Muffy, Shifty and I lose the contents of our wallets to crap such as…

- More beanie-plush Cthulhus (They’re so damn cute when they suck your soul from ya!).

- I get 5 more sets of dice to make up for whatever years of Gen Con I’m about to miss.

- A compilation of Lovcraftian, Cthulhu mythos stories.

- Mini remote control cars.

- Miniature replicas of Star Wars vehicles and ships.

- A T-Shirt with a shield and skulls designed by Brom.

- A Mystatonik University Student Parking sticker (an inside Cthulhu joke).

- A KFC (Kids For Cthulhu) T-Shirt.

- A life-sized, anatomically correct mannequin of Herve Villachez that says, “I love the Cheese Castle” in Portugese, when his pinky finger is squeezed.

(I made up that last one just to see if you were paying attention.)

- After Shifty and Muffy were taped out and exhausted, they decided to hit the road. I stay and do the last of my people watching.

PEOPLE WATCHING LESSON #5:

MASKING TAPE HAS FAR MORE USES THAN I THOUGHT. EVIDENTLY, IT CAN BE USED AS A BIKINI.

- I meet up with Bruce and Leslie again. We all plan to meet Hope and Mario at the entrance to the main hall at the last minutes of Gen Con and head out to a restaurant and toast the end of the biggest gaming convention known to mankind!

- I take one last walk around the main hall and at 3:55pm, I head to the main entrance and meet up with the rest of the gang. As we leave the convention center there are no tears, just disappointment that this is the end.

As the curtain finally closes on Milwaukee’s last Gen Con, many gamers wander slowly back to their cars and hotels and get ready to leave the city, not to return to Milwaukee next year or possibly ever again.

There will be another gaming fair next year in Indianapolis, which I’m sure will be very, very good. Who knows, I may even make the trek out there in the next few years. But one thing is for sure, it won’t have the same charm as it did in Milwaukee! Let’s face facts; if it ain’t in Milwaukee…it just ain’t Gen Con!

The End………


I hope you enjoyed my homage to the Gen Con's of old in these last several posts. For the next blog we'll be back to normal as I wax poetic on the video game masterpiece Red Dead Redemption.

Stay vertical, true believers!

Zangz.